LIMO-GATE, PART DEUX — CHAUFFEURING CHAUFFEURS: While the European Parliament continues recruiting for its soon-to-be internalized limo service, the current driver service has been employing an unusual method to get its fleet of cars to Strasbourg: putting them on the back of lorries. Instead of being used to drive MEPs, their staff or their documents from Brussels to Strasbourg, the vehicles have been stacked-up empty on a transport truck. The Parliament says it doesn’t care how the contract is carried out as long as the car service is available in both Brussels and Strasbourg. “The subcontractor of the Belgian company with which the Parliament has a contract, sends its cars to Strasbourg by lorry, because that subcontractor also has the contract in Strasbourg for which it needs its cars normally used in Brussels,” said Parliament spokesperson Marjory van den Broeke. “Once the car service is internalized the drivers will drive the cars over from Brussels to Strasbourg.”
WAITING ON WINKLER: Few in the European Parliament were shocked to see President Martin Schulz appoint his loyal chef de cabinet Markus Winkler to the role of the assembly’s deputy secretary-general this week in Strasbourg. When he takes up the position officially in November, Winkler will be positioned right below Schulz’s parliamentary frenemy, Secretary-General Klaus Welle. But there’s already speculation over how long Winkler will last in the new role, given that he starts just two months before Schulz is slated to hand over the presidency to the European People’s Party in 2017. A high ranking Parliament official said, “If Schulz leaves, Winkler will last 10 minutes.”
GREAT DANE: In order to deflect criticism that the whole EP show is becoming too German, Schulz decided Tuesday that his new chef de cabinet will be Kristian Knudsen, currently acting director general in the Parliament’s DG for the presidency. Winkler will take over as deputy secretary-general on September 1 on an acting basis until his appointment becomes official on November 1.
THE POLITICO BREXITOMETER: David Cameron performed well in a televised debate Tuesday, but didn’t land a knockout blow. Meanwhile the polls have swung towards Leave and the betting odds on Brexit have tightened.
TAKE NOTE, KIDS: Schulz loves telling the story of how the soon-to-be-second-most-powerful-person in the Parliament’s administration — Winkler — landed his first job with the political powerbroker by showing up on his doorstep. “Schulz learned about 20 years ago that he was allowed to have an assistant and Markus was from his constituency,” our source said. “He waited for Schulz in the canteen outside of his office for hours and said ‘I heard you need an assistant’ but Schulz said ‘no.’” So he kept waiting in the canteen, the legend goes, until Schulz finally agreed to give him a job. Persistence works!
SPAM OF THE WEEK — CALLING ALL GOLFERS! Pa’olelei Luteru, Samoa’s ambassador to the EU, is looking for golf partners.
MOSCOVICI IN THE MIDDLE: Progressive Alliance of Socialists and Democrats leader Gianni Pittella used a powerful prop at the group’s weekly meeting to defuse an outcry from bankbenchers about Schulz’s latest staff shuffle. Frenchman Pierre Moscovici, the European commissioner for economic and financial affairs, took the stage to divert attention from the sensitive issue, our sources said.
GENDER BALANCE … THROUGH BREASTFEEDING: In a week during which men dominated the public stages of Brussels, notably at the European Business Summit, there was one exception. The European Conservatives and Reformists group issued a calendar promoting breastfeeding, including via distribution inside the men’s and women’s toilets at Parliament.
#YES2BELGIUM: Prime Minister Charles Michel is trying to promote investment in Belgium — seemingly through ticket sales to dinners he is keynoting. You’ll be set back €490 as an ordinary punter if you want to hear Michel speak about what a good place Belgium is to do business, at a British Chamber of Commerce event on June 22 at the posh Steigenberger Wiltcher’s Hotel on Avenue Louise. The event will feature something described as a “networking dessert.”
THE ROBOTS ARE COMING, THE ROBOTS ARE COMING! But don’t worry, the Parliament’s legal affairs committee is currently considering a 19-page report that will save us all. The draft report notes: “There is a possibility that within the space of some decades AI (artificial intelligence) might surpass human intellectual capacity in a manner which, if not prepared for, could pose a challenge to humanity’s capacity to control its own creation and consequently perhaps also to its capacity to be in charge of its own destiny and to ensure the survival of its species.” Time to build a bunker in the Parliament!
WELL, DUH: The robot report goes on to note that “replacing the human factor with robots could dehumanize caring practices.”
MARINE WHO? MATTEO WHO? After announcing his intention to open a golf course in Scotland the day after the EU referendum on June 23, Donald Trump was asked by reporters if he saw himself in alignment with European populists such as Marine Le Pen and Italy’s Matteo Salvini. Trump said he did not see any similarities and denied ties with Salvini, the leader of the separatist Northern League, saying: “I didn’t want to meet him.” Salvini disagrees: He’s been sharing pictures of the two men together at an election rally in Pennsylvania on April 25, and Italian media have the impression the pair met for 20 minutes, with Trump allegedly telling Salvini: “I hope you become prime minister of Italy soon.”
MAY THE BEST CHRISTIAN DEMOCRAT RESEARCHER WIN! Are you a post-graduate researcher in history? We’ve got exciting news. The European People’s Party group has created a program of grants for researchers interested in the history, role and impact of Christian Democracy on the process of European integration. Most importantly, you’ll be in Florence. Unless you choose the option to do the research in Bonn instead.
WHO’S UP?
Mario Draghi: New research shows he often outperforms the other EU presidents in media visibility. Money talks.
WHO’S DOWN?
Angela Merkel: Portrayed in as the modern Hitler in Turkish media, and labeled a dictator by the deputy leader of the rising Alternative for Deutschland party.
Clarification: Last week we attributed to the newspaper FAZ a report that European Parliament President Martin Schulz was considering a bid for the presidency of Germany. We should have made clear that the FAZ article was an opinion piece suggesting Schulz might be good for that job.